Dear Tanya, How Do You Get Over a Breakup

Dear Tanya, How Do You Get Over A Breakup?

Teenagers are known for their ability to easily fall in love. Teenage romance is a once in a lifetime experience, and while the movies make it seem like a beautiful never ending story, realistically that’s just not the way things work. We grow up watching Disney movies, chick flicks, and seeing romance as an easy thing for years and years, yet find ourselves in relationships that don’t work out the way it was planned. Sure, the cuddles, presents, and having someone to spend each second with is an addictive feeling, but when things break off it feels like the end of the world. 

So… how is it that we get over heartbreak? The simple answer is- we don’t.

When you truly love someone, they will always be in your heart, they will always make an impact on you. It’s not about completely forgetting that person, it’s about learning how to accept these feelings and move forward from the person you once called your all.

The first step- is cry. Cry and hurt, eat junk food, get cozy with some of your friends. Talk to people about it and scream on top of your lungs until you can barely breathe. Feel each negative emotion intoxicate you, wonder why, wonder how. Think of every moment you spent together and let yourself be sad that it’s over. Allow yourself to feel this way, as it is a normal human being function. This step should last for a day, maybe up until a week. Get it all out while you can.

The second step- BURN EVERYTHING. Not literally everything, and don’t actually burn it, but get rid of it.. Get rid of their sweaters, of the pictures you have together, possibly even that cute necklace or t-shirt they bought you for your birthday. If you’re feeling nice enough, return their belongings, if not…trash it. You don’t need that negativity in your life.

The third step- acceptance. Stop being sad that it’s over, be happy that it happened. As stupid as it sounds, you have so much more going on for you. You have that education to keep up with, that money earning job, and your beautiful self to keep care of. START focusing on yourself, what good is it to hold onto to something that isn’t there anymore?

Eventually you will forget all the pain the person has caused, you will forget all the negative moments, and be grateful that you had those happy moments with that person. You will find someone new, you will fall in love over and over again until you find that special someone. All pain is temporary, and you are so much stronger than you believe.


Tanya Rivero